How to please everyone
Crunchy omelettes, buttery cheesy tomato-y udon and cooking with ketchup.
It is becoming harder and harder to cook for people. I yearn for simpler days, when everyone I invited to my table happily ate what they were served, full stop.
It’s just that such days never existed...
First, there are always children, who just take their time growing to enjoy all the things adults eat (well, at least in an ideal world).
And then there’s everyone else, with their particular likes and dislikes, with their moral choices and practical ones, with intolerances, allergies and a good deal of other restrictions. They’ve always been around, just maybe not quite as vocal.
And so, I am here with the eternal puzzle of cooking for people who aren't me. And it’s really complicated.
Even with children, there’s a whole multi-coloured rainbow of preferences. My oldest likes his eggs soft and runny, his younger brother prefers them firmer. They disagree on which vegetables they’ll tolerate, whether ketchup will ever touch their burger (yes! one of them is very unusual like that), and even some cakes are not beyond the pale (cheesecake, perish the thought, is not universally liked)
And with adults, I have friends who'll eat raw oysters without hesitation but draw the line at anchovies and capers; one who can’t eat white food, the other won’t touch anything but. Food preferences follow no logic whatsoever.
This week I'm thinking about cooking for (and with) my kids, yes, but also the broader question of cooking for anyone whose tastes don't align perfectly with your own.
The usual solutions are unsatisfying. You either end up as a short-order cook making three different versions of the same dish, or you water everything down to beige until nobody's particularly excited about dinner.
The trick, for me, is building dishes that are modular by design. I start with something really delicious in its simplest form, then create natural entry points for complexity. I do this constantly – I'll eat exactly what my children had, but alongside my own additions – kimchi, other ferments, Ortiz tuna, jarred beans, or a whole load of raw diced vegetables.
A baked potato is perfect on its own with butter and salt. Adding some grated cheese and tuna (and even better, sardines), will turn it into a complex mini-meal. Sweet potatoes with tahini and roasted aubergine take it somewhere entirely different. The base stays the same; the possibilities multiply.
These recipes work for children, for most adults, and crucially, they're fun to cook with kids - mainly because they both include ketchup, which apparently makes everything acceptable (unless you’re my oldest son, Max). They’re also perfect for jazzing up for yourself.
Crisp omelette
As someone who stuffs crisps into sandwiches, I'm entirely on board with crisps in an omelette. Inside, they soften into little pockets of flavour, while scattered on top they give a happy crunch. The saltiness means you barely need to season at all – though this does depend on which flavour you choose (I think prawn cocktail could be delicious).
This dish reminds me of a Spanish tortilla - potatoes inside an omelette. It's also one of those dishes that bends to whoever's eating it. Skip the cheese if you need to, use whatever herbs are lurking in the fridge. Cook it longer for those who like their eggs firm, less for those who prefer them creamy. Anchovies for the grown-ups, ketchup for the children, cherry tomatoes if you need something fresh on the plate.
Cheesy, buttery, tomato-y udon
Spaghetti with tomato sauce is my most faithful dinner – perhaps all of ours.
Thick udon noodles are a bit more fun than spaghetti, dare I say, with that chewy texture. The whole dish is super playful, but couldn’t be more straightforward: brown the tomatoes properly, let the butter and oil do their work, add the noodles (or cooked spaghetti if you prefer).
The cheddar and ketchup might raise eyebrows, but they add exactly the right sweetness and richness. Perfect as is, or dress it up with sesame seeds (well toasted and roughly ground), chilli oil or fresh chilli, lots of fresh herbs (basil or coriander) or even a handful of spinach and rocket.
The ultimate test
Our usual recipe testing process goes something like this: develop > test > retest > send to our recipe tester, Claudine (who catches everything we’ve missed) > test again > write up.
This week, since we’re claiming these recipes are actually good to cook with kids, we thought we’d enlist some helpers. Claudine brought her children into the testing process, and my colleague Clodagh had her little one cutting spring onions for the very first time. It was chaotic in all the best ways – a kitchen full of steam, noise, and that brilliant kind of concentration children get when they’re trusted with real tasks. Thumbs up all round.
Serves 4 (2 adults & 2 children)
Prep 15 minutes
Cook 20 minutes